Friday, May 6, 2011


Thor was awesome. There that is my review. A lot of people did not like the first half an hour or so, to that I say shut up. This movie was awesome. The special FX, the acting, cinematography, the dialogue, the characters themselves. Kenneth Branagh did an absolutely phenomenal job re-creating this larger than life world. Hemsworth as Thor was the perfect choice. He has the bluest eyes I have ever seen. I will not lie I leaned over to Jen Buddy and told her thatI had gay thoughts for him, cause HE was the part.

Thor has always been one of my favorite superheroes, and in reading Stan Lee's book, I learned that Thor is one of his favorites to write. This is such a unique story. The characters are derived from Nordic myth, as is the setting of their story. It is a unique thing to take something that has been around for thousands of years and transform it into a modern day story, blending it with the new age demi-gods that we have deemed as heroes. The acting in the film lent to the mythos from which these beings sprang. I was involved from the beginning and found myself caught up in the wonder that is Asgard. Anthony Hopkins as Odin worked so well, he has this very knightly air, due to the fact that he is very straight in his actions, but cross him and he can summon a beastly anger. He has the stately manner of a king and in another life would have been a fantastic Caesar.

Middleton as Loki was the perfect choice. He played the part of the mischevious weasel perfectly. I felt that this movie played off of the biblical story very subtlely. Loki was the younger brother who attempted to beguile his way into a position of power. The eldest brother was sent to earth to complete his pre-determined role, dying then receiving the mighty power of his Father and resurrecting. The culmination of the movie was in a final battle between brothers, an Asgardian Apocalypse if you will. Maybe it is a stretch. I think that the progression of the story was very fluid and each of the cast fit in very well with one another and the overall story. This movie is a testament to the thought that Marvel has put into the writing and creation of their comics into movie form. Oh and Stan Lee's cameo was amazing. Well played Generalissimo.

Go see this movie. The world that they created was so visually spectacular you can not help but immerse yourself into this unique character. I think we could all read more Thor, He is a fascinating character who is surrounded by a supporting cast of equally fascinating individuals. The best part is, this story's genesis stems from myths that are thousands of years old. How great of an adaptation is that? It's almost good as the re-telling of War of the Worlds with Tom Cruise... Sometimes I hate Hollywood and their terrible ways.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

It has been so LONG!

Hello loyal subjects. I have not posted on my beloved blog since 2010, I have been in better hiding than Osama it would seem. He's dead. Much has happened since I last made my presence known but that is neither here nor there. What is important is that Gears 3: The Beta is amazing, and we have a summer of blockbusters to look forward to. Especially everything with Johnny Depp and Shia LeTerrible. I specifically refer to Transformers and Pirates, because they are both going to be terrible and the studios have drained these two franchises like a fat baby feeding on an anorexic woman's teats. Listen I understand that 86.3% of American movie-goers are easily entertained morons but don't trick them into spending their recession earned money. You wouldn't kick a blind baby seal in the face would you? Would you?

I see Thor on Thursday and I am looking so forward to it. The acting and directing are two areas that i am expecting to be strong. I need it to start off the Summer right, well Summer in movie seasons. Fast Five was obviously so terrible, I mean except for the Rock's ability to not be robotic. I love the Rock as much as the next wrestlingphile, but he was so bad in this movie it shocked me. I couldn't believe that he was allowed to do such a terrible job. If any of us go to work and do a terrible job, on purpose, we would get written up and maybe demoted. He keeps finding work, and this won't deter future employers, i.e. studios, from hiring him. It is a crazy world we live in when people who are completely incapable of doing their job make more than 65% of the people in Africa put together, except for the savannah tribesman. It is much more lucrative than you think, herding sheep and fighting leopards with spears and poverty. Point is Fast Five was not good, Paul Walker is a cheese dick and I was entertained the whole damn time. I was. Justin Lin, the director, filmed it well, the audio was superb and the acting was horrendous. Best part of the movie was the obvious fight between Vin Diesel and Mr. The Rock.

We have some big movies coming out in the Summer, finally I am sick of animated frogs and Brazilian birds. Who honestly gives an animated rat's ass about these filler movies. Pixar of course is amazing and anything that they do is not filler but blockbuster. Rio?! who cares? Not this guy, with the two thumbs. I have missed all of you, my beautiful followers and I am back!